Here it is, the world's best police Facebook post, from the Bangor Maine Police Department Facebook page. Calling 911 -- This cop needs a mic! Fast!
The widely shared, and completely incorrect, post which was shared over the weekend in the Bangor region regarding a white (some say tan but we don't want to get into a blue dress argument here) van and an attempted abduction was yet another reason why we should count to twelve million by one-thousands before we assume each white van we see is filled with abductors.
Abductors don't even operate white vans since the advent of Facebook- it's very 90s.
If I had a white van in my possession I would buy a case of Krylon or even Rustoleum in a red or a blue. I mean, just as a precaution against being pegged as a kidnapper when I only wanted to ask for directions.
Here is the story- someone in our region was concerned about an interaction they observed in which the driver of a van stopped to ask a person where the closest gas station was.
This is a common question and it seems plausible that a white van from "away" might need gas. Additionally, the driver in a white van from "away" might not know where the closest gas station is.
The driver of the van then approached a person holding a small child.
A bystander observed this activity and made a post, but also called the police *(which we are very happy about)* and shared with us what they had perceived as a possible kidnapping situation.
Police were able to find the van, and the driver. The driver was a 77-year-old woman who both needed gas, and- oddly- loved babies. She had just used the short interlude to take a quick gander at the child as she is KOABF (kind of a baby fan).
While the post was shared 1305 times in our area (incidentally, about 49 times with me) and caused terror in the hearts of all people who have children or white vans- no one was kidnapped, touched, or harmed during the friendly colloquy.
Of course, the registration plate was quite clear and in this case it helped police located the correct van.
The 77-year-old female operator of the van was horrified that anyone might consider that she was out kidnapping babies.
BTW- she has no history of such things and has a fairly clean driving record.
She is 100% guilty of driving a van that is not very economical when it comes to fuel usage.
While it might seem we have been under a full-scale attack of kidnappers nationwide (according to the volume of posts about it on "the Facebook)- we are not.
When you see a post about repeated abduction attempts, go ahead and hit the Google machine and find out how many abductions have been reported in the news. Before you waste your time- the number is very low in relation the the Facebook posts.
Here in Bangor- 0 (FYI).
If the number of Facebook posts about abductions equaled the number of abductions at the Walmart parking lot in Anywhere, USA- all Walmart stores would be completely devoid of humans.
We know that is not the case, and while we all hope for shorter lines, we are happy about that.
"If you have a white van, paint it red"- TC 10-08-18
Keep your hands to yourself, leave other people's things alone, and be kind to one another.
We will be here.